Blog Entry #3: "Is There Anybody Out There?"

The more I learn the more I realize "I don't know anything."  So far in my LIS studies I have been completely overwhelmed by the information coming at me.  This is not to say that I am not learning anything, I am.  In fact, I think I have learned more in the past month then I have in the past ten years.  So why do I feel so behind?  I think it's because I am being asked to do things that I never have done before.  Take this blog for example... I never before have written a blog.  It's different.  It takes skills and a thinking process that I have never developed as a youth.  Reading Richardson has slowly opened my eyes to what a blog is and how it can be used.  But, that doesn't mean I can write a good blog.  You can look at a bike and someone can tell you how you are suppose to ride that bike but that doesn't mean that you can just get on a bike and ride.  It takes practice and guidance to learn how to ride that bike.  So I look at this blog like my "blog with training wheels".  I'm practicing.  And boy do I need practice.  The thing that gets me is the one sidedness of this blog.  Richardson refers to blog writing as "connective writing".  I don't see any connective aspect to this blog.  I write to one person, who I am assuming is reading this, that may or may not comment back.  There is no way to know who will read this outside of the one who assigned this to me.  (You know who you are)  Even if someone does stumble upon this blog and read it, will it even matter to them?  Will anyone find this useful?  If not, what's the point?  I can see using a blog in the classroom being a futile exercise if not managed correctly.  Blog specific reading and writing skills need to be taught before we let students loose on the web.  You wouldn't just throw a kid in a pool and just expect them to swim. (Some people might, but they are crazy!)  As teacher librarians we need to be the lifeguard to make sure our students don't drown.  But what happens when the lifeguard is still wearing floaties?

Blog Entry #2: "I need to find my 'Big Boy" voice"

Being overwhelmed is a strange feeling for me.  That's how I feel when I go on the wiki discussion boards and get lost in all the talk.  It seems like everyone is far beyond me in terms of how to express themselves in intelligent well thought out posts.  I do the readings, I try to keep pace... but retaining the information is so difficult.  It is so much at once.  I think all my memory is full.  I think it’s time to delete my early childhood to make room.  Goodbye Mrs. Gunther, my kindergarten teacher, thanks for the snacks!  That’s why I like this blog.  It gives me an opportunity to just put down thoughts without worrying about being judged.  It's like I'm talking to myself... but not.

This week of readings was pretty interesting.  I see a lot of what I am learning in class at my work when students are asked to do research for a project.  The article about the 'information behavior of the researcher of the future' was spot on concerning how kids look for information.  They can find some information quickly but they can't evaluate the information they find.  On top of that the really don’t know what they are looking for in the first place so the just throw as much stuff into Google and use the first few matches on the search list.  The speed in which they find information gives the illusion that they know what they are doing.  As educators, it is up to us to teach the skills that these kids will need.  Only when we work together, library staff and classroom staff, will we be able to be successful in giving these students the IL skills they will need in the future.  That’s where things get sticky.  For years, teachers have been protective of their classrooms and librarians have been looked at as secondary staff.  The culture must change so that everyone can come together for the benefit of the students.  In the school I work at, it seems like everyone is content doing their own thing.  In fact, we do not even have a qualified SLMS on campus.  It's just not on the priority list.  This is putting our students at a disadvantage.  My hope is to be able to wake my school up to the fact that things need to change.  I know that is a huge task.  I even started to lay the groundwork.  At our "Media Center Meeting", where we are suppose to discuss issues concerning our SLMC,  I brought up the fact that we need to get some kind of collection policy in place and was told to hold that thought while we decided "What kind of posters we can put on the wall".  I tried to push the issue only to find out from my supervisor a few days later that people at the meeting were upset at me for making them feel "uncomfortable".  That was my clue that my school is in desperate need of a culture change.  Can I do it?  I don't know, but I'm going to try.

Blog Entry #1: "What Have I Gotten Myself Into?"

When I first found out that I was going to be taking an online class I thought to myself, "I'm in deep trouble."  You see, I'm not what you might call a self-motivated student.  I always got buy on paying attention in class and taking part in discussions face to face.  I like to think as I talk and most of the time I can use my conversation skills to squeeze out a good grade without much effort outside of the classroom..  I'm a people person at my core.  I crave personal interaction with groups.  This is where I thrive academically.  Working independently has never been my strong suit.  I never did homework in high school, and needed a tutor to keep on me to get things done in my undergraduate studies.  But, that was over ten years ago... Certainly I am a changed man.  I must have grown up and matured these past years.  Well...  Not so much.  I am constantly fighting my urge to put things on the back burner.  Working full time doesn't help my time management ether.  Early on asked myself "What have you gotten yourself into?"  It seemed hopeless.  I felt like I was on an island, all alone with my computer, left to fend for myself in the 568 jungle.  Luckily, after a few e-mails and reassurance that someone is always there to help if I need it, I have started to get my footing.  I think I am starting to get the rhythm of working at home.  I even turned off facebook to finish assignments, like this blog for example.  I still am afraid of what's going to happen if I let myself get off track or fall behind.  The fact that I am not a very strong reader gets me particularly nervious.  I can totally see me droning in reading if I am not careful.  Also, I am constantly unsure if what I am doing is good or if I am on the right track.  I always need that feedback and reassurance that I'm doing ok.  Pressure to get good grades is new to me.  I never gave much thought to my grades before entering graduate school.  But now it seems like so much more is at stake.  If you had to ask me right now I like taking an online course I would say I don't like it too much.  But hopefully as we move forward I will learn to adapt ant thrive in this environment.  When all is said and done I hope to look back on this experience and remember it when I am trying to help a student who may be feeling the same things I am feeling right now.  As they say, "What doesn't kill you, only makes you stronger."